One Year Ago

A year ago I was feeling off. I would wake up in the middle of the night nauseous and have to go downstairs to find some crackers to fight it off. Not thinking anything of it. 

A year ago I was drinking my morning coffee and it tasted like the best thing ever. Then the next day it made me horribly sick and I couldn't even handle the smell. 

I found myself in our closet crying because well our clothes were so disorganized and it was upsetting. 

I started to notice I was feeling oddly crampy and had the worst pain in my boobs I ever felt. I was feeling intense pms symptoms thinking that I was about to have the worst period of my life. 

A year ago I started to wonder...could I be pregnant? Am I? No because I feel like I'm about to start my period. 

I had a dream, about the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen. 

A year ago my period was only a few days late. But it's usually right on time. I figured it was just from stress from the wedding and having a big life change. 

But I started to wonder...

I began to be extremely exhausted and I had to take a nap everyday after work just to make it through. 

A year ago, today I was at my parents with the whole family, and talking to my sister in law about how I was feeling. She told me that I should take a test, just to see. And as I finished eating gluten/dairy free pizza I felt so sick from it. I laid on the couch just praying I wouldn't throw up. 

I knew something was up. 

That evening I drove to Giant to get a test. Thinking the whole way there that I just knew something was going on. At least I prayed because I was becoming a very  sickly and hormonal person that if I wasn't pregnant, I needed some special therapy. 

I came home and immediately took a test. I wasn't going to look at it for a whole two minutes. 

As I set the test on the counter, I saw two little pink lines that changed my life forever. 

I stood in my bathroom in shock, tears streaming down my face, and shaking staring into the mirror. So many thoughts ran through my head. Excited, scared, happy, shocked to name a few. My heart raced as my husband called and said he was on his way home from work. Would I tell him right away? I placed the test on our bathroom counter and paced all around our house trying to calm myself down. Waiting for him to get home felt like the longest 20 minutes of my life. My husband walked through our door and I immediately told him to go upstairs into our bathroom. He spotted the test. 

A year ago my husband found out he was going to be a father. With tears in both of our eyes we hugged each other, and still couldn't believe it. We both wanted a baby but we wanted to wait just a little. 

God had other plans. 

A year ago, February 1st 2015, I found out I was pregnant.  As soon as I wrapped my mind that this was real and I wasn't dreaming. I started to pray. I prayed every single day, multiple times. I prayed for my baby to be healthy, grow strong, and be everything we wanted. 

A year ago I developed such a deep love for someone who was as tiny as a poppyseed but would grow as big as watermelon. Only to have our love grow even bigger before officially meeting. But I had not the slightest clue how much I would love my baby. 

"Before you were born

We dreamed of you

We imagined you

We prayed for you

Now that you're here

We hope for you

We love you, and we

Thank God for you

Every single day"

Ellexia Skye you are our world and you are everything and more that we prayed for. You may still be so little but the impact you have made in your mommy and daddy's life is truly incredible. 

You are such a blessing

A miracle

The best gift. Ever. 

<3

Ellexia's Name Meaning

One of the most exciting things about having a baby(besides having a baby ;) is choosing a name. I always had names picked out that I liked..what girl doesn't? But when it came time to actually name my baby. I started to not like anything. Choosing a name was fun, but also so challenging. Before we knew what we were having we looked at both boy and girl names. But for the life of me I just hated all boy names. I'm pretty sure that was my mother instincts working, because I just always had a feeling I was having a girl. As soon as we found out we were having a girl, picking out a name became tough. Mainly because both my husband and I are so stubborn we wouldn't agree on anything. We actually had her middle name picked out first, it was a compromise as well. Caleb always wanted to name his son Schylar but I don't like that name at all, especially not for a boy. We came across Skye, and we both liked it for a middle name. 

There are names that we both liked. So we made a list each and read what the other had and circled the ones we agreed on. Our list became smaller and smaller over time until we were down to our top picks. My husband's top pick was Alexia and mine was Elliana, and I wanted to call her Ellie. He wasn't against Ellie but didn't like Elliana. I liked Alexia, but I wasn't a fan of the spelling because I had my heart set on calling her Ellie as a nickname. I remember our ride home from the beach thinking how could we possibly make up our minds and agree on a name. Well it just hit me, what if we change the spelling of Alexia since I did like that name a lot, to Ellexia. And then I can still call her Ellie. We both win. Of course he had to sleep on it. He always said that he would only call her Ellexia, but now that she's here, he calls her Ellie. And he has admitted to that she just looks like an Ellie. So once we wrote out the full name it just felt like that was our baby girl's name. Once we agreed we sat on it for a few days before revealing to family her name. Only family and close friends knew her name, just because we both didn't want to reveal her name publicly until she was born. And I'm so glad because it made announcing her arrival even more special.  

Does her name have a meaning? Yes, of course. Even though the spelling is changed, it still has the same meaning. So here's a breakdown of her name 

Ellexia- Defender of man, helper

Ellie- bright shining one. Light

Skye- Sky

Ruth- This is my mom's maiden name. There weren't any boys in her family to carry on the name. So she put it in my name. And I always said if I have a girl, I will put it in her name. 

I love her name but I already get funny looks because I'll tell people we call her Ellie and they don't understand until I explain how her first name is spelled. Sorry baby girl for giving you a name people will always ask you how to spell. But your mommy has dealt with the same thing, and it'll be ok <3 I hope she grows up loving her name as much as we do. She's defiantly the bright shining sky of our world. 

❤️

Three Month Update

Happy THREE months baby girl!

She's officially considered an infant and not a newborn anymore. Excuse me while I just shed tears over that fact. She has grown so much. I already miss my tiny little baby that would just sleep all day long, and who couldn't even fit into newborn clothes. But on the other side of things, I love seeing her grow and learn new things. Seeing the world through a baby's eyes is amazing. Everything to them is new and wonderful that they just take everything in. Every month I try my best to look back on the day she was born and remember everything that happened. I never thought I would forget so much considering I had it a lot harder. But I truly only remember bits and pieces. 

I know I'll never forget the moment I met her. That moment was worth all of the pain and exhaustion.

Her little personality is really starting to come through. She loves to be talked to and she'll respond back mainly with squeals and smiles. I keep track of her growth and if she's meeting milestones through different apps. This girl is only three months but she is acting like she's four and half months...I think I may have my hands full the older she gets ;) but you keep on learning little girl!  I'll probably say this all the time. But watching her grow and learn just really is incredible. 

Seriously having a little girl is the best! Getting to dress her up and take pictures is just so fun. It helps that I have a little model on my hands that enjoys it! But she is defiantly a little diva because she will let me know as soon as she's done and had enough of pictures. 

Weight: 11 pounds. 

Height: 21 3/4 in

Eye Color: Still a pretty blue. 

Hair Color: Light brown/blonde AND ladies and gentlemen...it has some red in it now!! 

Diaper Size: Size 1!

Clothes Size: I had to officially put away all of her newborn clothes...so sad. She wears 0-3 months most of the time. But some of her pants are 3-6 months.

Sleep: During the day I'm lucky if she sleeps an hour. But she usually takes an evening nap that is two hours. At night she goes 3-4 hours stretches. We had one 7 hour stretch and that was amazing. But I think she was/is going through a growth spurt.

Eating: Every 2-3 hours during the day. Night is 3-4 hours. She has a semi-schedule down. 

Likes: Being talked to. Her toys, especially her owl. She just snuggles up with it. Still loves going places. She's such a good baby when I have errands to run. Loves to be naked and have her belly tickled. 

Dislikes: Hates going to sleep. She will fight it so much. 

Still throws a fit when she gets dressed but not as much. 

Milestones: She will rollover now! But not everytime she's on her belly. She's been reaching out to grab things. And she especially loves to feel her blankets and toys. It's cute because she will watch her hand open and close. She's been holding her head up so well now. We got some giggles going on to. Oh how I can't wait for the first real belly laugh!

Firsts: She had her first daddy-daughter day and loved being with her daddy all day. Celebrated her first Christmas and got to bring in the New Year. You can read about those here

Personality: She is such a little ham. She smiles and giggles all the time. She just is a social butterfly and loves seeing people and being talked to. 

<3